Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Is It Really Hating???? By Shana Jay

I always hear the term “Hating” being used incorrectly and under the wrong circumstances. First lets define what “Hating” is..(Of course I had to venture to the urban dictionary.)  Hating: When one puts down the success or fortune of others due to jealousy. Ex: She is “hating” on me because I won the lottery and she didn’t. Lets also define “Throwing Salt” this means to intentionally degrade somebody. Now throwing salt got its name because of the stinging feeling one gets if somebody where to put salt on an open wound.  The effects of “throwing salt” at a person are usually the same, but the stinging is on an emotional level.
Now lets go to class and do some critical thinking for a minute ….the question that I want to raise is although it may seem like one is hating or throwing salt is it considered hating or throwing salt if what is being said merely the truth?  The reason I say this is because people use both terms so loosely yet they haven’t realized what constructive criticism really is. Constructive criticism is criticism kindly meant that has a goal of improving some area of another person’s life or work. 
The issue with constructive criticism is that most people are not all that receptive to it.  In some cases I am guilty about this as well because it may not be the day for me to hear about myself. What I have realized is that people who really care about me are quick to correct (rebuke) my actions if they are inappropriate and in the same sense I therefore return the favor out of love not to intentionally hurt or bruise egos.
The lesson today is there are real haters/salt throwers out here but what one has to realize that if what is being said is the truth and causes internal conviction then one may want to evaluate those issues. A good friend of mine made a valid point and I will leave you all with this: “If people are bringing you the same issue or if situations are happening repeatedly to you …are you reflecting back to see are the things being said true?  What portion of this will you own or take responsibility for?   Class dismissed.

Shana Jay