Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Learn to Detach!! By Shana Jay

Learn to detach...Don't cling to things, because everything is impermanent... But detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate fully. That's how you are able to leave it... Take any emotion--love for a woman, or grief for a loved one, or what I'm going through, fear and pain from a deadly illness. If you hold back on the emotions--if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them--you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid. You're afraid of the pain, you're afraid of the grief. You're afraid of the vulnerability that love entails. But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your head even, you experience them fully and completely. You know what pain is. You know what love is. You know what grief is. And only then can you say, 'All right. I have experienced that emotion. I recognize that emotion. Now I need to detach from that emotion for a moment.

I read this quote and it really hit home for me. I am the type that can mask pain very well and this comes from my background. I was told at an early age crying was a sure sign of weakness and from then on I took that with me in my adulthood. I would always tell the people that have actually seen my cry they better not tell anyone. The reason I would say this is because I hate being vulnerable and also looking vulnerable to others.  
The writer made valid points and one that really stood out was “Learn to Detach.”
For some people detaching from painful situations come easily than others. For me it depends on the severity of the situation. In past relationships that went sour overtime I learned how to isolate myself not just from the person but from the actual reality of it all. This was and is my way of coping because dealing with the pain would cause me to have to examine myself.
            Everybody may not be as open as I am in this area but in order for me to help others I must first help myself. Overall God allows situations to happen for a reason and I do believe that He won’t give us anything that we can’t handle. As a matter of fact, in going through my trials I have acquired thicker skin. Learning to detach is a skill that I’m in the process of mastering because harboring pain, negativity and regret is not healthy; not to you or others who are involved.
            In conclusion, lets learn in 2012 to detach! Just because things did not go as you planned it doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. Everything that happens to you is a lesson ..learn from it …digest what you can and throw away the bones. You can’t live life fully if you carry baggage this will only weigh you down from the true purpose that God has for you!

Shana Jay

No comments:

Post a Comment