Saturday, September 24, 2011

Forfeit by Shana Jay

Typing until these thoughts fall off
Listening to my heart until the beat goes soft
Holding my breath waiting for the fairy tale to end
Building the wall brick by brick meditating to Vivaldi’s violin
Skeptical about what’s unknown to me
Unsure about this strange new territory
Seems I’m being put to the test
Forced to show all of my weaknesses and my emotions are about to crest
I can’t quite digest this dose of medication that’s being administered to me
Sugar coating this bittersweet substance makes my stomach queasy
The valley of distance is persistent maybe I should take heed
Be careful and tread lightly are the words that dance in my head
Premeditated is not the ending I contemplated yet patience is the penalty
I see more than I speak of sometimes its better this way
I discern what isn’t visible to the naked eye revealing the master of disguise
 Anxiety builds quiet as a mouse recanting my appeal
Not really sure of what I believe to be true
Time reveals the concern as the four seasons build an unbearable weight
I sit back keeping track of what’s fiction and fact giving my heart time to deliberate
My mind operates on levels I can’t explain
I turn it over to God the controller of my domain
Not afraid to take risk just leery of the aftermath
Not sure if rekindling is the right path
I dig deep in my love language leaving signs along the way
My mind says you can do this
My heart says sorry I’m not ready Im afraid I don’t want to play 


  1. I love this it for the third petal of your heart :-)